September 12, 2006 @9:05 PM
hmms. i've got work to do. i think this task is going to take an entire week. a whole year's worth of cheques to be verified and entered into the system.. but while i was doing the entries, the WONDERFUL client dropped by the office and gave us MORE of his reciepts and invoices for the past year.. OMG. so i had to put my task on hand on hold, and go tally and match the reciepts that just got in. and because of these new reciepts, i got to re open the stuff i finished for the months of jan to feb.. ZZZ! and guess what, i only finished matching 5 month's worth of invoices and reciepts from 3- 6pm.. i got like another 7 more months to go tomorrow.. haha. and after i do that. i wil get back to my 5 files of paper and one laptop. for one figure, i got to trace like so many different components that make up that amount... SO TEDIOUS!!
hmms. anyway. its going to be soon. soon i guess. haha. hmms. oh oh..
hmms. maybe. maybe not.
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i guess i was expecting an answer that had more thought put into it. i was thinking about it the whole night.. i just couldnt get over the answer that you gave me. maybe the question was a little lame. but i think i deserved slightly more? i was really disappointed. i was wondering if these are sighs that God is giving me. somehow, i cant seem to confirm my hesitancy .. i guess. im just asking for it eh? sighs. im so tired.. but i think i will remain online for a little while longer.. just a little while longer.. im simplyhopeless. im just wondering. how something from so long ago can stay so long even without nuturing. it seems to just stay there. i thought time heals everything and make it all go away, but i was wrong. through time, things from the past magically becomes clearer and a part of me. forgetting them would be the same as asking me to forget who i am. sometimes i ask myself, is it all worth it? i guess my answer would be obvious by now. i just want to know. maybe only then, can i take the next step in my life. i dont really know what i should do now. what i am now and what i want to be, is what you made me to be. i want to be like you. in moments of uncertainty, i've always thought of my inspiration; you.
im not sure if im ever going to publish this....
on a final note;
"but i guess, it's one's wish on what one chooses to believe or not. my beliefs do not require u to believe in what i choose to belive because of incomprehension, and the inablility to believe beyond what we understand; makes us all very human." Amelia
⥠you and i both loved
